


Luck and Shame

by Tak138



Series: Kai&Nicole [3]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Rape/Non-con Elements, Submissive Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:48:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24564103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tak138/pseuds/Tak138
Summary: Ezra gets into some trouble late at night and can't go home. Luckily, Kaius is there to help him.
Series: Kai&Nicole [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1612975
Comments: 7
Kudos: 55





	Luck and Shame

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my friend Cat for beta'ing 💙

They were woken by a knock on the door. 

Kai woke up immediately and knew Mistress did too because her arms were tensed around him. They lay in silence for a minute, the only sound a gentle patter of rain at the windows. His heart was beating so fast in his chest. Mistress' hand found his and squeezed. 

Another knock. Softer, more tentative. Behind him, Mistress took a deep breath through her nose, opened her mouth to taste the air. Scenting for threats, for any taste of rage or malice. Kai mimicked her movements, but Alpha's sense of smell always proved far stronger than his. She must not have found anything, because she curled over him to kiss his brow and slid out of bed. His skin immediately ached, burning from the cold in her absence. In the dark, he watched her pull on her robe from the door hook, hiding her bare body. Then she walked out to the living room. In his briefs, Kai trailed after, hovering in the hallway while Alpha eyed the door. Still suspicious, still threatened, still worried. He could tell by the way she squared her shoulders, puffed out her chest. She glanced back at him, and Kai's heart stuttered. She was worried for him. 

Another knock, just a single rap. As if whomever stood outside had decided no one was home. 

"Open it, Mistress?" he whispered into the gloom of the apartment. Disturbed from her slumber, Roe padded up to his side and leaned her soft pink body against his ankle. 

Alpha unlocked the door with a single smooth movement before opening it just enough to peer out. 

"Jesus _fuck_." She flipped the light on, throwing the door wide. Kai's stomach dropped to the floor. There stood Ezra, sopping wet, in nothing but a shirt and boxers, his arms crossed over his chest. And his face… bruised and bloodied and red with shame. 

Kai jolted into action, rushing forward to haul Ezra inside. "What happened?" he demanded, "What happened to you?" 

Ezra stayed quiet, trembling slightly, his eyes fixed on the ground. 

Alpha closed the door, her scent turning sour as she asked, "Did Lisa do this?" 

Ezra simply shook his head. His eyes were so, so empty. Kai's blood turned to ice. 

"You've gotta be freezing," he whispered, plucking at Ezra's wet shirt. To Alpha, he said, "Mistress, may I—" but she only waved him off, grabbing for her phone where it lay on the counter. Kai grabbed Ezra by the hand, his skin near waxen with cold, and tugged him to the bedroom. 

"What happened Ez?" he whispered, once the door was shut. 

Ezra stood in the middle of the room and swallowing hard. "I… I was being dumb."

Kai went to Alpha's dresser, since his clothes would be far too small for Ezra, and pulled out one of her white pajama shirts and a pair of shorts. He flung them on the bed, saying, "So it _was_ Miss Lisa?"

"No!" Ezra snapped, but then his shoulders sagged. Quieter, he says, "She didn't know I was out." 

His hair was plastered to his face, his lips were tinted blue, split and bleeding, and his skin pale below the bruises. The poor thing couldn't stop trembling, wouldn't meet his eyes. Kai gestured for him to lift his arms, and Ezra obeyed. Kai tugged him out of the shirt, letting it fall to the floor with a leaden smack, and starting to slide Alpha's shirt over his head. 

"So, you snuck out?" Kai sighed. "That _is_ dumb." 

They've been naked in front of each other before, so it was no matter to help Ezra drop his boxers and replace them as well. Kai made a point not to mention the bruises he found, made a point not to let himself ask why Ezra was in his boxers and not pants. Not yet. 

Quietly, Ezra croaked, "I know. I _know_. She's gonna be so fucking pissed at me, Kai. She's gonna be so, so mad." 

Kai tossed the wet clothes into the hamper, and pulled Ezra into his nest. Coaxing Ezra onto his bed, Kai sat down beside him and handed him his stuffed cat. Ezra smiled a bit, just the smallest upturn of his lips, and clutched the cat tight to his chest. And though he smelled strongly of Alpha, he still reeked of fear and pain. Kai bit his lip, brushing some of Ezra's hair from his brow. "May I ask why you were out?"

Ezra shrugged, leaning back against the wall. "She doesn't like when I go out without her, and I wanted to see my friends. I was gonna go meet them at the diner over on 3rd street, but I was… intercepted."

Kai's mind flashed to those bruises, the ones he'd seen on Ezra's ribs and hips and thighs. He took Ezra's hand, squeezing tight. He was still trembling, and Kai knew it wasn't from the cold. 

"I forget how bad it is down here," whispered Ezra. There's something off about his voice, something miserable that made Kai's stomach churn. 

Quietly, he asked, "What did they do to you, Ezra?"

There were no walls between them. Whatever walls existed had fallen the day Kai hid back here, covered in burns and blood, and Ezra had brought him out of his panic. Kai knew everything that happened back with Ezra's old owner, before Lisa, before the rescue. He knew things Ezra never shared with the counselors. Too many months have passed, too many midnight calls from the both of them, back and forth. Kai knew that look, the hollow despair in Ezra's wide eyes. 

"What do you think, Kai? I was a pretty little omega, walking alone in the dark like a fucking dumbass. I should have known better, I _do_ know better. I got what I had coming." 

Kai's throat went tight with tears, a shiver running through his body. "I'm sorry." 

"It's my own fault," Ezra shrugged, even as his voice cracks on the words. 

Kai said nothing. Not because he agreed, but because he knew Ezra wouldn't listen to him. There were so many things Ezra blamed himself for, so much of his own suffering that he thought was his fault. Maybe Kai might have agreed with him once, but he learned. Alpha helped him learn. Omegas were not meant to be hurt. And no matter how stupid Ezra's actions were, he never deserved _this_. 

Ezra tucked his knees in close, leaning against Kai's side. "Lisa's gonna kill me."

"Yeah," Kai agreed. "But she loves you. She'll take care of you." 

"She doesn't know. About… about the other times." 

_The other times_. Kai closed his eyes, a flicker of fury dancing through him. 

"You should tell her."

"God, _no_ ," Ezra groaned, burying his face in the plush cat. "She'd think I'm a whore. She already puts up with so much, I can't— I can't ask her to put up with this too." 

"... Mistress is going to tell her you showed up here without pants."

"I know," he whispered, a few tears leaking from his eyes. "I know. I-I just…"

He trailed off, and they sat in silence for a long minute. Kai's heart hammered in his chest, his skin prickling with goosebumps. Everything in him wanted to hold Ezra close, curl around him, protect him from this terrible world. 

He squeezed Ezra's hand once more, whispering, "She loves you. She'll help you through this." 

"She deserves better than me." 

"That's how I feel about my Alpha," Kai pointed out. "Every time I say that, you call bullshit and say, 'that's an unhealthy mindset'."

"This is different. You know it is."

"I know it feels that way, but it's… not." Kai swallowed, flexing his toes and watching Roe's shadow from where she was sat against the other side of his door. "She loves you. She'll help you through anything. She wouldn't have taken you on otherwise."

"Doesn't mean she should have to." 

"It does, though. You're her responsibility, she's supposed to take care of you no matter what. Do you not think she will?" 

"No, I know she will, she's so amazing," Ezra squeaked, "But I'm already such a mess, I hate that I've made it worse."

Kai went to say something else, but there was a knock at his door. It was Alpha, opening it just enough to peer it. "I called Lisa. She said she'll be here in the morning."

"In the morning?" Kai echoed, his brow creasing, "Not as soon as possible?"

"... She said she needs time to calm down. She doesn't want to scare him." 

At his side, Ezra went limp. His eyes slipped shut, his breath rattling in his chest. "She's mad at me."

"No, Sweetheart." Alpha's voice was soft in a way it never was, at least not with Ezra. "Not at all. She was… upset, but not at you. She still loves you plenty, don't worry."

To that, Ezra was dead silent. Alpha left, the door hissing shut behind her. 

Then, "What time is it?"

Kai peered at his watch. "Three-thirty-two."

Ezra groaned, burying his face in his hands. "God, I can't fucking believe I did this. I should have stayed away."

"No, no," Kai said instantly, grabbing him by the arm. "No, Ez. I'm glad you came."

"I just… I didn't want to go home," he rasped, "I couldn't stand the thought of going there, to her, to her bed, when I'm so fucking dirty."

"You're not dirty," Kai sighed. 

"I _am_. I— they—" Ezra swallowed a breath, hiccupping. "Can I please take a shower?"

"Of course."

Kai led him to the bathroom, acting as a crutch as Ezra limps along. Whatever adrenaline Ezra had must have faded, and his injuries seemed to be making themselves known. But Kai didn't comment, not until he helped Ezra undress, and gestured to the tub, "Sit."

Ezra scowled, "I can wash my own ass—"

Kai made a sharp sound, a _psst_ like he does at Roe, and gestured to the tub once more. "Let me take care of you. You look ready to fall over."

"I don't look _that_ bad," Ezra murmured, obliging anyways, wincing as he settled against the edge of the tub. Kai grabbed the shower head from its perch, turned the water on hot. It was at that point he realized Ezra had run here, without shoes. His feet were cut and scraped, marred by loose gravel. Kai said nothing, just began scrubbing him clean. Ezra lay totally silent, watching him work. 

He avoided the apex of Ezra's thighs, leaving that for him to deal with at a later time, and began to wash away the sweat and hidden grime. He took his time, allowing Ezra to relax, grow used to his touch. Then he snapped his fingers, gesturing for Ezra to turn, "Let me get your hair."

Ezra sighed, rolling his eyes, "I can wash my own hair, Kai."

"Glad to hear, I'm still gonna do it. Turn around."

Ezra rolled his eyes again, but they didn't look quite so dead anymore. So afraid. Kai had learned by now, from Ezra and his personal experience, that when an omega was scared and stressed, they needed to be told what to do. Ezra had done it for him a couple times before, now it was Kai's turn.

He wet Ezra's hair, and scrubbed in some of Alpha's sweet smelling shampoo. 

"I'm gonna go home smelling like Nicole," grumbled Ezra, "Lisa'll love that."

"She can deal with it," Kai shrugged. "She will deal with it."

Quietly, Ezra said, " I'm scared she's gonna send me back. To the rescue, I mean." 

Kai's movements paused, but only for a second. He shoved his momentary panic away, refusing to let it sour his scent. "You said she was a good Mistress."

Ezra stiffened, his mouth tightening. "She is." 

"Would a good mistress send you away because you were assaulted?"

_Assaulted._ It's what Ezra called those _other times._ It's a Person word, like _abused_ or _tortured_ . When an omega is _assaulted_ , it's just fulfilling its use. When an omega is _abused_ or _tortured,_ it's just maintenance. Part of him still believed that, but that part of him is still very much broken. Still very much cowed and stricken and hollow. The rest of him, the part that knew his Alpha loved him with her whole heart and didn't just see him as a tool, knew better. 

Ezra said nothing in reply, only hugging his knees to his chest. Eventually his eyes fell shut, some of the tension bleeding from of his body. Kai washed out the shampoo, replaced it with conditioner, and rinsed that out as well. It was only when Kai turned the water off, did he realize that Ezra was crying. 

He dropped the towel and touched Ezra's shoulder. When Ezra didn't flinch, didn't cower, Kai wrapped his arms around him and held on tight. That was all it took. Ezra buried his face in Kai's chest and _sobbed_. Terrible, back-breaking sobs that brought tears to Kai's own eyes. He held and held and held, rocking Ezra from side to side. 

"It's not your fault," he whispered, over and over, "It's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."

Ezra choked on a breath, a broken whine escaping his lips, "I should have known better, _I should have known better!"_

"It's not your fault, none of this is your fault," was all Kai could manage. Ezra let out another sob, his fingers digging into his back. Kai just held on tighter. 

"Im so fucking stupid," he wept, "God, I'm so stupid. I— I just wanted to see my friends."

Kai nodded, swallowing hard, "I know, I know. You didn't deserve this."

"I was being stupid—"

"Just because you did something stupid doesn't mean you deserved to be hurt," Kai replied back. Alpha told him that all the time, and now he truly understood it. Every time he was bad on accident, every time he spoke out of turn or went to get the mail because Alpha forgot and he wasn't allowed, he didn't deserve to be hurt. A light spank at the very worst, but usually she just made him stand in the corner for five minutes. Ezra deserved a spank, five minutes in the corner, and maybe no dinner, but he didn't deserve this. No one did. 

"C'mon, let's get you out of here before you prune," whispered Kai. Ezra nodded, wiping his face on his arm, and hissed with pain as Kai pulled him to his feet. 

Kai dried him off, helping him dress in Alpha's clothes. 

"They took my phone," Ezrs murmured, "My house keys." 

" _They?"_ Kai echoed, horror curling through him. 

Ezra nodded, staring at his feet. "Four." 

Kai swallowed a vicious curse, and went straight for the medicine cabinet. He grabbed a bottle of Tylenol, a word he only understood as pain relief. He dumped two pills into Ezra's hand, and ran the tap to fill the little drinking cup on the side of the sink. Ezra downed the pills without a second thought, leaning back against the wall. 

"I gotta— gotta go," he croaked, and when Kai opened his mouth to protest, Ezra cleared his throat. "No, I need to _go_." 

"Oh." Kai turned bright pink before leaving Ezra to his business. He found Alpha in the living room, pulling out the bed hidden in the couch. 

"How's he doing?" She sighed, as she locked the bed in place. Kai helped her straighten out the mattress, the sheet still on from last time. 

"There were four of them," was all he replied, voice ragged. Alpha's hands stuttered on the sheet, her eyes wide. 

"Does he need to go to the clinic?"

"No. He's… he's fine, physically." Kai swallowed, something in his chest giving way. "He didn't… didn't deserve this. Miss Lisa can't be mad at him for this."

Mistress went right to him, Kai turning to jello as she folded him into her arms. "She's not. I've figured out what Lisa sounds like when she pissed, and she wasn't, not at all. She was just… sad. She didn't hear him get up, didn't hear the door."

Kai sniffled, his eyes welling with tears. "Why are people so awful?" He whispered.

"I don't know, Sweetheart. They just are sometimes… " she sighed, and kissed him right between the brows. "I'm glad you were able to help him, even just a little bit. He deserves nothing but love."

"He's afraid Miss Lisa is gonna send him back to the rescue."

At this, Alpha scoffed, "Yeah, she would never do that. They would have to drag him out of her cold, dead hands. She loves that boy like nothing else."

Kai took a deep breath, allowing his Mistress to run her hand through his hair. She held him so tightly, her body so warm and her scent so comforting, Kai's tears dried up in a matter of seconds. 

Alpha hummed softly, her eyes tired and her smile weak. "You did a good job with him. Taking care of him."

To this, Kai was surprised to find himself smiling. Just a little bit. "He deserves it. He deserves the entire world."

The toilet flushed, and Alpha kissed his forehead, "Are you gonna stay out here with him tonight?" 

"If my Alpha doesn't mind?" he asked softly. She just shrugged, kissed him once on the lips. 

"How could I say no? Just don't stay up too late." 

"Will you be alright without me?" As soon as he asked it he knew it's a stupid question, and flushed a bright pink. "I-I didn't mean… "

Mistress chuckled, cupping his face in her hands. "I'll miss you, sure, but Ezra needs you more."

Kai couldn't help the smile that touched his lips, or the blush as she kissed him again. He thought of those words, the ones he heard her utter to her mother over the phone. He knew what they meant, even if she never sent them his way. They weren't his to say, not until she did it first. 

She wished him goodnight, something that still made him purr with delight even all these months later. He said it in turn, and watched her vanish down the hall. Ezra came out of the bathroom, looking at him a bit nervously. Alpha's clothes didn't so much hang off of him as they did swallow him. He always forgot just how wide she was. Ezra seemed huge to him, tall and broad set, at least for an omega. But the shirt was too long, the sleeves too wide. The pants were hiked up to his waist and they still dragged, the drawstring pulled tight. 

Kai breezed by him to the linen closet, pulling out extra pillows and blankets. 

"You're gonna stay with me?" asked Ezra, his voice soft. 

"If that's alright with you," Kai replied. "Unless you want some time alone?"

Ezra whispered, "No thank you." So Kai smoothed the comforter across the mattress, plopping the two pillows at its head. Ezra came up besides him, hugging himself tight. "Is Nicole upset?"

Frowning, Kai turned to look at him. "Why would she be upset?"

"’Cause, you know, it's almost four in the morning?"

Kai sighed, "No, Ez, she's not upset with you. She's just upset that you got hurt." 

"Is she alright with me wearing her clothes?" 

"Yes," Kai breathed, with false exasperation, "Now will you come lay down with me?" 

Ezra smiled just a little bit, and sprawled out on the bed along Kai's side. But his eyes had dimmed somewhat, his lids drooping, "She's gonna yell at me."

"If she does, she's probably just scared for you," Kai shrugged, as he lied down next to him. 

"She's always scared for me. I… I'm whole a lotta trouble, Kai." 

"You're a whole lotta worth it too, Ez." 

Ezra swallowed hard, holding out his hand across the mattress. Kai took it in his, gave it a gentle squeeze. 

"I'm sorry I woke you up, Kai," Ezra mumbled. "I'm so sorry."

Kai made another sharp sound. "None of that, Ez. Just get some sleep."

"You're so sweet, Kai. I'm gonna have to buy you and Nicole dinner for this." 

"Nonsense," he scoffed, "You don't owe us anything. She wouldn't accept it even if you tried."

Ezra blinked a few times, staring at the wall. "You're so lucky to have her, Kai. I was skeptical at first, but you're lucky. We're both so fucking lucky." 

"We are," Kai agreed. "Try to get some sleep, Ez."

He groaned, burying his face in his pillow. Kai slipped beneath the blanket and dragged it over Ezra, their fingers still entwined. It was quiet, the only light coming from beneath the front door, the apartment hallway beyond. He listened to the gentle patter of the rain, the whistle of the wind. 

Then: "I'm going to see their faces until I die,"

"I know," Kai said to the dark. 

"I see so many faces in my dreams," Ezra murmured, "So many people, every night…" 

Again, Kai said, "I know. I see people too."

"Like who?"

At this, Kai bit his lip. "I see my handler a lot. Number Seven, some of my other batch members. You're there sometimes, too."

"You ever see Nicole?" 

"Yes," he whispered, "Yes, I see her all the time. Almost every nightmare I have she's there, and she saves me. And then I wake up, and she's there too." 

Ezra swallowed hard, "I see Lisa sometimes. But it's usually… them." 

_Them._

His first owner, the one that kept him, young and afraid, chained to a bed. His second owner, the one that used him to make money every night, discarding him when he was eventually too exhausted to move. His third owner, who kept him locked in a cramped, hoarded house that eventually caught fire, leaving Ezra nearly incapacitated for a month. 

The scars on his back, on his neck, on his wrists. His feet, ankles, legs and hips. Burns from hot irons, cigars, knife slashes and marbled white flesh. 

Yes, Kaius was incredibly lucky. In more ways than one. 

"I love you Kai," Ezra whispered, "I love you so fucking much."

Kai smiled, his heart tightening in his chest. "I love you too, Ez."

And then it was quiet. Roe hopped up onto the bed, the springs squeaking as she flopped down against Kai's legs. Ezra shifted, letting out a rough breath. All Kai could think of were those bruises on Ezra's hips. 

_Four of them._

Terrible, wretched, awful people. The reason why Mistress got scared when he went to get the mail from the lobby. The reason why she only let him out onto the balcony when she wasn't at his side. This exact reason. And poor, poor Ezra. Just trying to enjoy his freedom after a life of torment. 

It was such a shame. 

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
